The Stakes Are High
Not long ago, I facilitated a meeting with a group of influential, well-resourced individuals. Afterward, one of the more prominent attendees asked me to collaborate on a separate project. I said yes, and we got it done.
Although there was no immediate reason to follow up afterward, I sensed the potential for an ongoing, mutually valuable relationship.
Here’s the message I sent:
Subject: Quick Call?
Greetings Katie –
Had a good call with Colin today. Wondering if we could grab 15 minutes to connect? I have two quick things I’d prefer to run by you over a call.
You can also WhatsApp me at +1-425-532-2870 if that’s easier.
Many thanks,
J.Paul
Short. Direct. Easy to say yes to - especially since I had already delivered on her previous request. A day and a half later I got this:
Dear J.Paul,
Good to hear from you. Many thanks for doing a call with Colin.
I’m in Toronto the rest of this week and pretty booked. I’ll be back in Europe Monday so a 15-minute slot one afternoon next week would be best (unless there is anything urgent). Please suggest a couple of times that would work for you.
Regards,
Katie
Just like that, the meeting was set.
My assistant followed up and coordinated the schedule seamlessly. We had taken time to build clear protocols and systems for moments like this. Once confirmed, Katie mentioned she’d like to include her colleague, Anthony, on the call. Bonus.👏
If I were a frontline major gift fundraiser, this would be the perfect time to log into the CRM and update my recent activity. “Meeting scheduled with Katie” Metrics would look great.
But let’s pull back the curtain.
What actually made that meeting happen - and what came next?
It starts long before the meeting
First, I was invited into Katie’s orbit by facilitating a gathering where we connected. During that meeting she learned about my work in major gift strategy for nonprofits.
Later, she asked me to connect with someone in her network to offer encouragement and guidance. I followed through.
When I next reached out, I wasn’t pitching anything. The call was simply about maintaining the relationship. It was timely and warm. A gentle nudge to stay connected.
The message was brief and confident - not apologetic or over-explained.
When she replied, the systems we had in place enabled me to respond with confidence and excellence. That made a difference.
Important Note: If you’re hesitant to allow your team to interact with high-level donors or connectors, it may be time to reassess their role, or reset expectations.
High-stakes fundraising isn't about hustle.
It’s about capacity. Posture. Timing.You don’t land meetings like this because you’re clever. You land them because you’ve built trust, shown up consistently, and stayed relational long after the original connection faded.
Tend to the in-between
Over the years, I’ve learned: relationships worth nurturing often outlast the project where they first began.
When I reached out to Katie, it wasn’t about getting something from her - it was about tending to a relationship.
There’s sacredness in that:
* In sending the note.
* In making the call.
* In showing up primarily to listen for what might unfold.
Yes, fundraising at this level requires strategy. But it also requires discernment. Humility. Patience.
If you’re ready to engage at this level, you’ll benefit from the kind of conversations we have in my coaching sessions.
These aren’t one-size-fits-all sessions. They’re 90-minute working calls focused on your real-world challenges:
- Engaging high-level givers
- Shaping bold proposals
- Navigating internal dynamics
- Strengthening team alignment
- And more, depending on your current mountai
🧭 If you’re a student of my online course, live coaching is $300 per session
🛠️ Not interested in the course? $400 per session
💡 No subscription. No contract. Just schedule what you need, when you need it.
If you’re tasked with raising serious funds and you’re stuck, let’s talk. We’ll get you unstuck - and moving in the right direction.
* * * * * * * * * *
If you haven't taken advantage of some of the resources I've created to help major gift fundraisers, take a look now! Initial calls with me are free and "no strings attached". Sometimes folks feel like they need to wait and not 'bother' me until they have a pressing issue. No need for that...just make the call. 🕺
Here's where you can access a lot of content for free:
* Follow me on LinkedIn - You'll get short pro-tips and reflections on major gift fundraising every day between 5-7am pacific.
* Breakthru Newsletter - As you've seen here, these are longer weekly posts (audio and written) sent directly to your email.
* Breakthru Blog - the newsletter from the previous week gets posted here each week for everyone (so email subscribers get it a week early).
* Breakthru Podcast - Interviews with high net worth givers about how we as fundraisers can get better at inviting them to the party. And audio readings of Breakthru Blog posts.
Before getting to the PAID stuff: My opinion is that no small ministry with a tight budget should be spending more than $3-5k (total) for major gift coaching/consulting. Most of you will be good-to-go spending far less than that. This was a major issue for me when I was a frontline fundraiser - major gift consultants were an expensive 'black-box-of-confusion' for me. That stops now.
Here's the PAID stuff:
* Online Catalyst Course - This is a full brain dump of my 28+ years of experience - good, bad, ugly. It's built around the fundamentals, the sacredness, and the fun, of major gift fundraising. It's infused with Henri Nouwen reflections. Many people can take this course and they will be 'cooking-with-gas' and not need any additional coaching from me on the core systems. I'm grateful that this course has gotten *great* reviews.
* Live coaching with me - I refer to this as "brain rental". The ROI on live coaching, as you might imagine, is extraordinary.
Finally, be sure to connect with my colleague Ivana Salloum. She's super awesome and can help with scheduling and access to resources, etc.
I look forward to hearing about your good work!
Blessings,
